The playing sounds great but (and I don't wan't this to sound like I'm being facetious!) but you're in the wrong key...haven't got my head around where you are on the neck but I'm thinking a 5th above the root because SOME of the notes are in. Please don't take this unkindly...you are simply in the wrong root blues note. With the skill you've shown doing this I'm sure it would sound awesome in the correct key.
"Purveyor of Home Cooked Tone since 1978 or thereabouts"
oops, i was so hungover when I did this forst thing this morning, I have just given it a little listen after a few cups of coffee, & I think you fella's are right....Oh well, it is kind of funny in a way