Your most embarrasing moment as a musician

**CanyonCarver** · 06-16-2003, 03:31 PM

Tell us about a fucked up gig you had.
Tell us about your drummer giving you a wedgie in front of 2000 people as you played your solo.
Tell us about how you tripped over your guitar wire, unplugging your amp. Tell us how you forgot your guitar at home and carried an empty hard case to an important audition for a major Metal band that is now touring the world without you, making tons of money and screwing barely legal gals from California to Nebraska.

Just a thought. Now let's hear it! [img]images/smilies/icon_jam.gif[/img]

ericgtr · 06-16-2003, 03:58 PM

Once, we were playing a country gig and our bass player was late so I sat down on the drums and played bass with my hands while the singer played rythm and sang. We did a couple of little two step numbers so I could go boom chuck chuck boom chuck chuck with the bass drum and hi hat. Everyone was laughing at us and I wanted to kill the bass player, he finally showed up after a couple of songs. For those of you who don't know I was as much a drummer as guitarists, it's just been a few years since I played the skins.

Wolfman · 06-16-2003, 06:30 PM

Hmm... not to many truly embarrassing stories, but I could come up with more than a few funny ones.

Here's something close to an embarrassing one though. When I was starting to get a little bit of a reputation as a hot young player in high school, I actually had a group of older guys ask me to audition for their locally known band. This was the 80's and these guys were a typical metal cover band with the name "Python" or "predator" or something like that. ( [img]images/smilies/icon_rolleyes.gif[/img] LOL ). Anyway, I knew the guy that was their bass player because he had gone to school with my sister adn I think some of her friends had tipped him off to me when they came over to see her and heard me playing in the next room.

These guys had done their own basement videos that resembled the VH promo vids of You Really Got me, Runnin' With The Devil, and Jamie's Cryin' and everything. They had me over to his house to watch the videos, and then he came and picked me up a few days later to audition.

Now, at the time, my rig consisted of a Washburn, A-10, a little Peavey combo and a cheap-ass DOD distortion pedal. [img]images/smilies/icon_redface.gif[/img] The guy I knew (Phil) told me they would have a marshall for me to play through, which totally blew me away. It would be the first time I had played through one, and I was stoked. So, they have a rented-out rehearsal space on what used to be an unofficial drag strip here in town. Matter of fact, that spot is full of businesses today and people still refer to it as the drag strip.

Anyway, I walk in and two guys stuck out to me pretty fast. First, their singer looked like the big ugly blond fucker from the Sean Penn movie "Bad Boys". (You know, the guy that tried to take Penn up the cornholio and later had his nose busted with the coke cans in the pillowcase [img]images/smilies/icon_mrgreen.gif[/img] ). This guy was actually scary to me - he was everything a lead singer for a metal band should be - intimidating like Brian Johnson of AC/DC, good vocal chops, definitely looked the part. The other one that stuck out to me was the lead guitar player, a guy named Tony that worked in a pizzeria (wait till you hear the name...LOL ) that my friends and I used to hit after school to play video games. He looked like Vito Bratta of White Lion (who weren't even around yet) and used to sit behind the counter with his black Les Paul all the time instead of working. So I see him and go "Hey man, I know you from 'J.J. Jinglebottoms' ! " (Told you the name was a winner) A couple of the guys kind of laugh and he just kind oif sneers and goes "uhh..yeah, man". LOL

Well, I plug in and we start going through stuff like Motley Crue's "Looks That Kill", some AC/DC stuff, maybe some Ratt. Well, the rig was so hot compared to what I was used to, and it kept feeding back on me like crazy. I was totally embarrassed and couldn't concentrate for shit after that. They said to just ignore it and play the way I normally would. They were nice guys, really. Phil drives me home and when he pulls up to my house, he gets out a photo album of them gigging and stuff, and he talks to me for a bit. He was cool enough to tell me that he didn't think it was going to work out, but that I was going to be a great player and to keep at it, and that maybe I should come back sometime in a few months. At least he let me down easy, but it was a totally humbling experience.

**Mondy** · 06-17-2003, 02:15 AM

Everytime I post a clip of my playing dude...

[img]images/smilies/icon_lol.gif[/img]

**CanyonCarver** · 06-17-2003, 08:06 AM

Mondola, LOL!

Coyote · 06-17-2003, 02:57 PM

Well, this didn't happen to me, but the singer.

We were doing a gig in a bar, a lot of friends & relatives there (brothers and sisters mainly). We'd just gotten through a few songs, and we started to play "Die, Die My Darling". The place went crazy. So crazy, that a couple crashed into the singer (we were playing on ground level), and the three of them landed in the drums. No major damage to neither the drums or the threesome. Our singer would've punched the guy, but he was the bass-players sister's fiancé. Execpt for that, it was an ok gig.

siN · 06-19-2003, 04:50 AM

It was on a contest at my school back in 87 or 88. I contributed there with three or four different bands, formed specially for this occasion.

It was the first thing on the contest (the opener) and I was there on stage with my other pals doing "Twilight Zone" of the "Golden Earring" (famous dutch band, over 35 years of Rock n Roll).

My setup was: No-name guitar, curly cord, Boss HM2 (heavy metal) footpedal, curly cord, Novanex 30 watt solid state amp.

So in the middle of the song I start walking from one side of the stage to the other side and my curly cords (and the movable Boss pedal, powered by battery) are just sliding on the floor with me.

And THEN...... suddenly no guitar sound.

Sh*t..... Looking quickly over my cables and all things just look connected properly.

Try again... No sound.

I walk to my amp. Check power, check cord. Nothing wrong.
I follow the chord to my Boss pedal, check power, check both cords. Nothing wrong.
I finally check the other side of the cord, which was fitting into my guitar. It was still in for the main part, but it was about a quarter of an inch (less than a centimeter) moved outwards, so it made no connection.

I hit the plug back in and YES, there was sound.....

Just on time to play the guitar solo part of the song....

Anyway. The jury complimented me about that I represented a very cool-headed guitarplayer. Man did my head glow entirely red at that point.......

We ended with this one almost latest (2nd or 3rd from below).... [language problem over here].......

This was very embarrasing at that moment. I still be reminded to this everytime I watch the copy of the video that was taken then....

**CanyonCarver** · 06-19-2003, 07:21 AM

siN that's a classic story. Heard stories like this one soo many times!

**Mondy** · 06-19-2003, 08:33 AM

Heh heh heh !!!

Okay, well this one didn't happen to me, but to my brother's bassist during a gig.

Hmm, sod it, I'll tell you a couple of things...

Both stories are related to Wireless Systems...

Both my brother (guitarist) and the bassist had these wireless systems. They used to play in this pub which had doors on both sides of it. So, as a party trick, during Panama I think, I can't remember, anyway, my brother would run out of one door, the bassist would run out of the other door, they'd cross each other halfway outside, and then enter by the opposite doors.

All the time, they'd still be playing the song...

Anyway, I went to see them play at this pub, and the time came for this party trick. He'd been telling me that it was so cool ! Anyway, they both run out the doors, and as soon as they do, intertwined with their respective guitar signals, is the communication from the taxi rank across the road :

"Anyone free ? Coming up free ? Falcon, you back from the airport yet ?"

Anyway, I told him after the gig what happens and it dawned on them then why the crowd really loved it so much. They'd done it 4-5 times before, and the crowd thought it was so funny. The drummer was the only one left in the pub, and all he could hear was the thumping of his drums, he couldn't hear the taxi calls. Outside, my brother and his bassist could only hear the drums (he's feckin' load !) so they couldn't hear the signal either !

All this time they thought they had been so cool, and the reaction from the crowd seemed to cement that... No-one had told them until I came to watch.

Anyway, they quickly went back to cables once again.

So, I'm watching them at this other gig.

Another party trick of the bassist was for him to jump up on the bar, whenever I was getting the drinks in. He'd then rush across to me (mid song, still playing) and then he'd crouch down in front of me and tell me their order !

This went both ways. The crowd always thought it was well cool, and I always loved it, could it made me feel so special and then I'd get loadsa recognition from people in there, and the odd girl.

Anyway, he sees me at the bar. Comes running away from the rest of the band, jumps up onto the bar, takes two steps towards me, and pulls all of his rig over with him !!! He's completely forgotten he's not on a wireless rig anymore !!!

The band quickly goes into We Will Rock You with just the drums and a microphone, whilst my brother hauls the rig back up, and plugs everything back in, just in time to do the solo bit on the guitar !

Man that was funny...

[img]images/smilies/icon_lol.gif[/img]

Wolfman · 06-19-2003, 09:15 AM

LOL! Great stories, mondola and sIN! [img]images/smilies/icon_thumb.gif[/img]

Here's another one from my high school days that makes me laugh - hopefully you guys will enjoy it as well. I've been searching for a flyer that I saved from this, but can't find it after searching for it for three days ( [img]images/smilies/icon_rant.gif[/img] ). I'm sure I'll find it as soon as I post though. [img]images/smilies/icon_mad.gif[/img]

Anyway, I was jamming with these guys for several months and we had been playing parties for a while - mainly just jamming and letting party "patrons" provide the vocals, since we really didn't have a singer yet. We were doing a ton of hard rock/metal stuff - VH, AC/DC, Judas priest, Def Leppard, etc.... We had given ourselves the name "Guns for Nuns", which we later found out was the actual working name for some band somewhere. Oh well..

So the other guitar player in the band was in contact with some guys that lived near him and his mom and was talking us up, which really was a huge mistake. We had two of us that were good guitar players, and a great drummer, but no bass player or singer. We ended up having a friend of ours thinking he could pick up bass really easily even though he had no musical background, so he goes out and buys himself a bass and considers himself a bass player all of a sudden ( [img]images/smilies/headscratch.gif[/img] ).

Well, this guy's talking us up lands us our first actual "gig" with some of his neighbors. They told him they were going to be having a hug BBQ party outdooors and would love to have us play and just have people there jump up and sing as needed. Sounded great to us until he shows up with the flyers for the actual event. It turned out it was going to be for the "Iron Warriors Motorcycle Club", and it wasn't just for some typical BBQ - it was a freaking pig roast at the Dix River. [img]images/smilies/icon_surprised.gif[/img] All of a sudden we are sweating bullets thinking about how we would get our asses kicked and would be left to rot out in the woods if they didn't like us. Not just because we had no singer, but we had a "bass player" that we knew was going to be fucking up everything, if he was even playing at all. LOL We ended up either backing out of it or not showing up at all. Pretty sure we came up with an excuse and told them we couldn't make it, because if we had just been a no-show, I probably wouldn't be alive writing this write now. [img]images/smilies/icon_wink.gif[/img]

Anyway, if I can manage to find the flyer for it, I'll scan it and post it, because it totally gives you an idea of what we were getting into.

In hindsight, it probably would have been a lot of fun and they would have been happy just hearing us jam and letting us "kids" get drunk with them. But back then, fear outweighed reality.

wip5150 · 06-19-2003, 06:37 PM

sIN, Mondola and Wolf - Fantastic stories. [img]images/smilies/icon_thumb.gif[/img] [img]images/smilies/icon_mrgreen.gif[/img] I need to share some of mine - not as funny, but reasonably humorous. I'll post 'em in the next day or so

wip5150 · 06-19-2003, 06:52 PM

Alright, I'll share one now.

I was in a band in college - typical college band with typical college band talent [img]images/smilies/icon_mrgreen.gif[/img]

Anyhoo, we were (and I still am) in a HUGE Spinal Tap phase. We would walk around campus all day long and quote Nigel, David, Derek and Ian just because it amused us. One Saturday night we had a gig at the TKE house off campus. We'd played there before and usually was a pretty good time with loose, tipsy coeds.

Our usual set was typcial - VH, Lep, AC/DC, Dokken and every once in a while we'd mix in a Tap song. This one Saturday was no different. Normally, I would sing and play (poorly) rhythm guitar - That night, I played bass. Our bass player (who actually had some talent) brought three bases so we could play "Big Bottom". Not the most difficult song in the world and we were doing a pretty decent job pulling it off.

During the show, I had been making eyes at this one lovely chic who had parked herself conveneintly by the keg [img]images/smilies/icon_thumb.gif[/img] [img]images/smilies/icon_wink.gif[/img]. In fact, it looked like ol' WIP5150 was gonna get lucky [img]images/smilies/icon_thumb.gif[/img]. Alas, events conspired to turn this dream into a nightmare. This one lard-ass of a frat daddy was really getting into the song - singing along with me (aparently, he was a tap fan as he kept shouting at the top of his lungs, "HELLO CLEVELAND!". Just as I was singing "talk about mudflaps my girl's got 'em", this dick leaps up on the stage and grabs the mic out from in front of me. We stop playing in shock as he says "THIS is a big bottom" and proceeds to drop trou in front of the group. [img]images/smilies/icon_surprised.gif[/img] He was correct, it was a big bottom.

Now, this cat had to weigh at least three bills - maybe closer to four - and his ass looked like cottage cheese that had been sitting in a Texas sun for 17 days. Quite honestly, it was disgusting to look at. I looked in the audience - the frat daddies were laughing hysterically (and frankly, it wsa pretty damn funny) but the girls were completely repulsed as well they should be. My little keg-babe couldn't handle the view and threw up right then and there [img]images/smilies/icon_cry.gif[/img]. To this day I'm not sure if the reason for her vomit was:

a) The music
b) The cottage-cheese ass
c) The 38 glasses of Keystone Light

The show went on as tubby's friends dragged his sorry ass off the stage, but I never did get laid that night. [img]images/smilies/icon_mad.gif[/img]

siN · 06-19-2003, 11:38 PM

Great stories!!

I'll tell you one more. This wasn't happened to me, but to other guitarplayer back in the beginning of the 90s. That isn't our current other guitarplayer.

We did a gig at a decent stage (about 3 - 4 feet of the ground / 1 meter of the floor). We entered the stage from the room beside that, which had a normal door (about 7 - 8 feet high / 2 meters high).
While entering your head is a bit upfront of the rest of your body, so we didn't had any trouble in getting on stage.

After the gig, our other guitarplayer rushed off the stage and collapsed against the upper wood of the open door frame. He was just bleeding as a cow! He needed to get to the hospital very soon and he got some stitches.

siN · 06-19-2003, 11:56 PM

An other time, at the same place as my previous post, we weren't allowed at the main stage, but needed to gig in the cellar, which ceiling was about 7-8 feet high.

SO DO NOT JUMP!

The stage was just on the floor (still not a high cellar).

This time all arrangements were pretty poor. Our "room" was upstairs. They arranged beer, cola and some sandwiches.
Our singer at that time (which isn't our current singer) needed to do a GIANT piss, but he couldn't find a toilet within 20 feet and didn't want to go downstairs.

So he took some plastic cans and filled these right up..... I thought this was funny!!

For the rest it was a lousy gig, lousy public and lousy stage. We've never been there anymore....

**CanyonCarver** · 06-20-2003, 07:12 AM

WIP5150 that was a fantastic story! This could go right into a script, just as it is. You described it so well I can smell the beer! [img]images/smilies/icon_thumb.gif[/img]