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Old 12-21-2011, 10:58 PM   #1
sethschonfeld
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Location: Long Beach, CA
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Critique my song - So Shall It Be


Hey everyone. Just signed up tonight. My names Seth Schonfeld and I play acoustic guitar and sing my own kind of new folk music. Haha.

I wrote this song a while back. Please read the lyrics and give me some feedback and critique. If you want to watch the video along with the lyrics click the link.

So Shall It Be - Seth Schonfeld
- Video

Lyrics-
She kneeled at the same altar
In the same position as before
She begged forgiveness from the only one
Who ever cared for her

She threw her body and her soul down
From the window of the church
That swore they'd save her from her demons
And save her from her self

He wept underneath the willow tree,
That once suspended him above
The frozen water at his feet
Had never looked so tempting

He stood and paced the soggy ground
Beneath the soles of his shoes
When you've got no one you've got nothing
Got nothing left to lose.

I know that there's something greater
When i feel the spatter of the rain
Against my face
The wind blown through my hair

And I don't fucking care about a destination
Give me fire, Give me suffering
Its all the same to me
If fate should will it, Then so shall it be

If fate should will it, Then so shall it be



Thanks for listening let me know if you love it or hate it!
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New Folk Music
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"new folk music", acoustic, folk, indie


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